LittleRedChucks

My sister says she doesn’t know many female comedians or cool women in comedy. I feel I have failed as a sibling. So I am compiling a list.
I now know how it feels to be burdened with great purpose!

shadowgorawr:

lets play “how gay can you be with your best friend without it getting weird” 

Be careful with this game. You’ll end up shacked up together with an engagement ring on your finger. Trust me.

(Source: pgrls, via the-queen-procrastinator)

scumbag-boyfriends:

x

This is how it works at our house too.

scumbag-boyfriends:

x

This is how it works at our house too.

(via thecouchwitch)

I’ve always had an uneasy relationship with comedy. I wasn’t particularly funny at school. I remember I used to do an impression of Shaggy out of Scooby Do: (Zoiks! Like make for the door, Scoob!) which a friend thought was brilliant. During a lesson I did it in a whispered voice. He laughed. The teacher asked what was going on and my friend announced that I could do this really good impression. The whole class turned to look at me. “Let’s hear it then.” I got up, did the impression and stood there while the whole class turned around silently. My impression wasn’t mentioned after that.

When I first started doing comedy, I didn’t want anyone to know about it. I would skulk off guiltily into the night and return after dark like a murderer. Usually it was me who had been murdered.

The most important thing in stand-up is to learn how to die with dignity. Because you will die many times. The worst deaths are the first ones, when you don’t know why you’re dying. You’re leaping about like a performing monkey to a graveyard of faces. If you do something wrong at the beginning of a gig, you’re in trouble. You’re talking, throwing shapes, but you’re coming across like a brown mumbling lump. If someone dies badly on stage it can destroy people’s trust in the entire concept of stand-up. The silence following death is like a black hole. It sucks everything in unless the compere performs a swift exorcism.

Unfortunately, where one person might have sympathy, crowds become sadistic. Audiences are afraid at first, scared you’ll fail - they don’t want to have to see that. They have to be reassured that you’re funny if you die at a gig - there’s no possibility of escape. That’s what death is. But you’re not even safe after death. If you’ve died, people see it as an open invitation to offer you advice. It ranges from the consolatory, “Hey, keep it up, keep plugging away”, to the honest, and infinitely preferable, “You were shit, mate”.

I was on tour a few years ago, the gig hadn’t gone well for me. Flailing about to an expanding silence. During the next act, a heckler in the crowd was promptly humiliated with a well-honed put-down. So the heckler got up, turned round, undid his trousers and unveiled a big round arse. After the gig he accosted me: “Some of your stuff was quite funny. I like the kind of stuff that a lot of people don’t find funny.” Later on he explained his arse-showing criteria. “I don’t mind it when a comedian takes the piss out of me. But when they call me stupid, well, I show them my arse.” He spoke these words with a seriousness, with a weight of sorrow almost, as though he was imparting a great secret. Audiences are strange unwieldy beasts - beware.

— Julian Barratt, for The Independent Saturday 27 June 1998 (via heartrachel)
annashake:

Noel what are you doing with your pants?Is it because Julian is performing fellatio on that beer bottle? 

annashake:

Noel what are you doing with your pants?
Is it because Julian is performing fellatio on that beer bottle? 

(via meeplegirl)

lokidream:

stellapollet:

"I’m not going to do the ice bucket challenge, I’m very sorry. It’s not going to make a difference if I do it or not. Everyone knows about the ice bucket challenge by this point. So instead I wanted to do what, it seems like a lot of people who do the ice bucket challenge don’t do, which is: talk about ALS, explain what ALS is."

he’s also going to donate $1,000

So my daughter has Spinal Muscular Atrophy. It’s like ALS but it affects kids. Everything he’s describing my three-year-old has gone through. A cure for ALS could also be a cure for SMA. So thank you to everyone whose raised awareness and donated.

(via teddybearofdeath)

rainflaaash:

i see london, i see france, i see noel’s 70s porno pants

rainflaaash:

i see london, i see france, i see noel’s 70s porno pants

(Source: makememighty, via dives-and-divas)

orplid:

Noel Fielding in 'The Mighty Boosh',a British comedy troupe featuring comedians Julian Barratt and Noel Fielding. The troupe is named after a childhood hairstyle of co-star Michael Fielding.

Someone once said to me that it really offended them when a wheelchair or similar was used flippantly or for comic effect in tv shows. She thought it was disrespectful. But my there-year-old watches this episode and gets ridiculously excited because, as she says: “Vince is like me! Vince is like me! I can be Vince too! He wants to be me!” Because she so rarely sees people on tv who have wheelchairs and this little throw away piece makes her ridiculously happy. She also loves the outtakes, when Noel can’t control the chair and knocks into things because she knows how hard those joysticks can be and she is proud that she handles her chair better than Vince. And I just wanted to share because it’s something that makes her happy and that makes me happy. And it was something I could say about this picture other than: Look how unbelievably hot his is!

orplid:

Noel Fielding in 'The Mighty Boosh',a British comedy troupe featuring comedians Julian Barratt and Noel Fielding. The troupe is named after a childhood hairstyle of co-star Michael Fielding.

Someone once said to me that it really offended them when a wheelchair or similar was used flippantly or for comic effect in tv shows. She thought it was disrespectful. But my there-year-old watches this episode and gets ridiculously excited because, as she says: “Vince is like me! Vince is like me! I can be Vince too! He wants to be me!” Because she so rarely sees people on tv who have wheelchairs and this little throw away piece makes her ridiculously happy. She also loves the outtakes, when Noel can’t control the chair and knocks into things because she knows how hard those joysticks can be and she is proud that she handles her chair better than Vince. And I just wanted to share because it’s something that makes her happy and that makes me happy. And it was something I could say about this picture other than: Look how unbelievably hot his is!

(via caramel-muffliato)

lupusadlunam:

thechangelingmedusa:
Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here. 

lupusadlunam:

thechangelingmedusa:

Like seriously, why isn’t pole dancing an olympic sport? This is freakin gymnastics. This is strength and skill. This is not sexual whatsoever. Why does pole dancing have to be so stigmatised as a sexual thing that only strippers do? I have great respect for all people who can pull this off. This is art and beauty right here. 

(via kidinthecorner15)